• Musings

    How does it feel like to be an introvert/ ambivert?

    34aa3187e74523d7f47a95a8446b04341 How does it feel like to be an introvert/ ambivert?

    well, if you ask me – it doesn’t feel very bad. but here are few things that i’d like to share.

    • no one is a 100% introvert. it’s usually like a 50-50 ratio, in some, introvert ratio is slightly higher, like around 60-70%.
    • i usually speak on topics that interests me.
    • i am not rude, i just need my own private space. i need time to think and be back.
    • i may not be a very good talker, but i am a good listener. i may not be the life of the party, but if you need someone to share something important –i am there!
    • people usually trust me more for not revealing their secret ( which is true with most introverts)
    • i like the fact that i am very self motivated. i don’t need constant flow of people around me to feel good.
    • i feel lonely when i am surrounded by people who don’t understand me.
    • i don’t get impressed by social, political or career status of anybody.
    • i like interacting with people – it makes me feel happy and i feel confident about myself. but too much of it is really exhausting for me.
    • i love day dreaming
    • i like listening to music, drawing, arts in general.
    • i like to sit quietly and watch a movie or research something that interests me.
    • it sometimes worries me that i find it difficult to fit in with everyone else and just mingle.
    • i feel judged. a lot.
    • i have a strong desire for social bonds. very less though. basically people who can understand me.
    • sometimes i feel tired in the crowd. however, doing an artwork by myself – refreshes me.

    XX

  • Musings

    I am more than what you see

     Please excuse the silence around here. I’ve been spending a lot of time with my cousins who where here in India for few days. Anyway, about two weeks back I watched Susan Cain’s Ted talk on the power of introverts and I felt someone has said stuff about that race of people to which I feel I belong. I was so overwhelmed after listening to this talk because it explained many of my eccentricities and it made my feel okay about them. It helped me understand myself in a positive way.

    08bf095ece21d4e266ab6808900e734b I am more than what you see

     For the longest time in my life, I’ve been around extroverts and I had a very different impression of them – I thought they are fun people, they like to mingle and move around in social situations, express themselves easily, more participative, more intelligent, in demand,  loveable and what not! And I, on the other hand – was very reserved in school, rarely use to raise my hand in class, was shy to talk to my classmates and teachers. And I am pretty sure it wasn’t some social thing happening just in school because I was  pretty much same at home with my family. It didn’t bother me at all till  my 7th grade, but then I changed my school in 8th grade and there  it was! Everything was new- school, teachers, friends and house – it was an eyeopener for me. As a student, teachers could see my potential, but I was not participative and interactive at all. But after 8 months or so – I could finally make few friends and it really helped me a lot to change and grow as a person.

    08bf095ece21d4e266ab6808900e734b I am more than what you see

     In school I was an introvert, but I somehow managed to do a little better and come under the ambivert category of people after many years. Going to college made a huge difference and it happened mostly because I was open to change – I wanted to let go off this hesitation within me and all I needed was people to support me and just be okay with me as I was. It helped really helped me to open up with people and express myself more. I am happy being an ambivert – I feel balanced and much more confident about myself.  There are a lot of things I hear about introverts and extroverts and none of them is completely true. It’s not true that extroverts are shallow or bad listeners and it’s not true either that introverts are sad or aren’t good public speakers!

    I guess people should just be themselves and should be supported for what they are and what they want to be (be that introverts to extroverts and extroverts to introverts). Everyone should be allowed to be themselves without being judged.

    xx

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