Gather around, friends. I am going to talk about something we all have been through. Not sure how many of you feel the same way, but we will see. I was born in a middle class family. We never had too much to spend and we formed our habits around that. Most of the people in my family can do almost anything with their hands. Growing up, I’ve seen my dad working with big machines, fixing things around the house, doing wood work, fixing electricity, pipes and what not!  On the ground floor of our ancestral house was a huge workshop with big machines and tools. Because we couldn’t afford help, we were encouraged to do our things ourselves. My mother on the other hand is a homemaker. Took care of everything and everybody like mothers do. Lately, I’ve been thinking about how we were raised and listening to all these feminist speeches got me thinking even more. I have always felt that we as kids are given a really pampered life (especially in India). It starts right from our birth, there will be constantly someone on our head to watch us – to make sure we don’t run because we will hurt ourselves or don’t go in the water because we might slip, to not have fun in the rain because we might catch cold. I mean of course some things makes sense but most of the times we are overprotected. Do you think so too? When I talk about this to people they say – that it’s easier said than done. I mean, really? Except these little things there are people for everything. There are cooks, cleaners, babysitters, gardeners, someone to clean the car, driver. I have always done my things myself. I still do. I like the thought of being in charge of own things. After living with my brother for a couple of years and now being married from a couple of years I have learned that the way we have been brought up is really biased and we are taught dependence since childhood.  For the most part our parents take charge of everything for us. To some extent it’s fine, but there should be a line. There must be a line.

Growing up, I wish I had known something about bank work, something about wires, fixing things around the house and I wish my brother had known how to cut a tomato, (hah) chop something if not cooking or keep stuff organised and clean. Why? Because it makes life easier when you are on your own. When your son/daughter or brother/sister or anyone will go to college or start living on their own, it will bother you less because they will know these little life hacks which are important irrespective of their gender. I am not against help, I’m against being dependent on other people entirely. In old age it’s different, but when I see young people dependent on others, it makes me SO mad. According to some researches, dependence on gadgets and people have adverse effects on brain. Remember the time before mobile phones? I use to remember phones numbers, they were on my tips. Now I don’t. It took me while to learn my own number. Dependence slows down the functioning of your brain. Similar things are happening to our lifestyle. Forgetfulness is a very common thing now a days. Gone are the days when we use to keep everything ready a night before. Now most of us don’t. Because there are people to do it for us. We just can’t do anything without depending on anyone anymore. Ok this post clearly went somewhere else. But you know what I mean, right? I can only imagine how life would be for the coming generation. It really bothers me. I can’t generalise this for everyone but parents really need to make their kids independent right from the beginning irrespective of their gender. I think it is SO SO important.  I would love to know your thoughts on it.

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February 13, 2017

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